I think jellies make a good nemesis picture…

As persistent and undefeated as it is, insomnia has transcended the rank of arch rival. Demanding far too much of my time and energy, it is my nemesis. Beyond rivalry, this is not about competition, it’s about ruining things. It’s about destruction. It’s about downfall. It’s an oubliette where I forgot what “normal” might be but I know I am decidedly not there.

The inescapable agent, offering retribution against those who give way to hubris. I’m certainly guilty of that. I thought I could do anything I wanted. I thought getting my MBA would open doors. It did, and I leapt straight outta the frying pan into the flames. Thought I could handle it. And I could, until I couldn’t

Nemesis: goddess of indignation and retribution for evil deeds and undeserved fortune. I am trying to learn to be kind to myself and honestly, I don’t think there were any evil deeds, but maybe a lot of undeserved fortune.

Maybe having my ego crushed isn’t so bad. My skull is still intact. Insomnia is just this insidious pest I can’t seems to shake off.

2 thoughts on “Nemesis

  1. Hello Theresa.
    I was struck by your theory that you had experienced “…maybe a lot of undeserved fortune.”

    Here’s a few quotes from someone who is in a position to know a lot about your experience: “…my intense need to perform academically…” “I worked my ass off.” “I studied a LOT…” “…I damned near killed myself trying to do all the things.”

    That person should be laughing at the word “undeserved”. You earned every damn thing you’ve got in your life that’s good and true. The crap is totally undeserved and definitely not earned. So there.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Teresa t-stories sound kind of sad today. You have accomplished so much in your life. Why don’t you use messanger so we can message back and forth with out other readers. I love reading the things you write. I have a feeling there’s more to this. Love ya kiddo.


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